I HAVE FOUND A NEW BLOG! SACRED INSANITY, "My story of addiction, loss, suicide, bipolar depression, abuse, love, hope, and life, not necessarily in that order." It's here: http://mysacredinsanity.blogspot.comI feel weird it's past midnight and I've had a manic flash. I could really do with a fan so I can feel the wind in my hair as I rush. I want to go swimming while manic. That's my new ambition. To go manic swimming.O I'm not going to go on about how I am y'all have heard it before and it'll bore y'all to hear it again. Suffice it to say my head is going a bit fast I feel good but kind of uncomfortable in that I'm MEANT TO BE GOING TO BED IN A SECOND and I don't think I'm gonna sleep. My body always knows it's late and that I ought to sleep. It lulls despite the mania and picks up noticably in the mid morning. Lulls towards evening picks up a bit at night if I don't sleep then on. If I do sleep I sleep very few hours, this includes on sleeping pills.My head is lit up with imagery again I see golden ants circling in formation a perfectly sawn off treestump. Freshly sawn. If I tried, I could count the rings but my eyes are open. Oh it's gone. I now see curtains in a theatre with abstract lights shone on.I am going out for a walk. Wish me luck. Here's stuff I keyed in earlier:~~
And here's another blog: Clean & Crazy http://surrendertowin.blogspot.com
Hey I've just found a write up of my personality. My personality now...It's here, bulletpointed: http://lifestyle.iloveindia.com/lounge/schizoaffective-disorder-10088.html
Jobs you can do with schizoaffective disorder: links
http://www.suite101.com/content/getting-a-job-with-schizoaffective-disorder-a352938
0021 ps music sounds SUBLIME! TRY LISTENING TO THIS:~~~~~~~
Barber's adagio for strings, Ferry Corsten trance version (William Orbit)
ISN'T IT ABSOLUTELY AMAZING, TRANSCENDENT, SUBLIME?
You still are who you are no matter what diagnosis you're tagged with.
ReplyDeleteThe label should not hinder individualism.
hi, could n't post yesterday as to how my day was, cus it wasn't. I had one of those (fortunately quite rare) stare at the walls day.
ReplyDeleteyuk. nothing sank in. only the real important stuff. like feeding Hamper G. I was meant to go clinic and pick up my script and i knew this but i didn't care, and i tried to care and tried to realise this would land me in some big trouble as the drug workers only come to this town once a week, but it would not sink in. NOthing would. Thick fog with no way through. I felt slightly better last night.but have woken in a fog again. not as bad as yesterday but not good. I am so worried of feeling like this on monday and not getting Hamper G to see her dad. I need some slight mania to get me through that one, like you say, a slide control behind the ear would be just fine ;-)
gotta go Hamper on the want
much love
x
ps. listened to barbers adagio for strings, yes sublime indeed, will get stroppy to put it through his speakers for me later, probably just a case of wire from laptop to stereo, but which wire and which holes would baffle me, also checked out sacred insanity, made me want to read back log, beautiful. I dont know how people have time to follow so many blogs. I scarecly have time to read yours some days. Saying that, yesterday i had time, as i did nothing all day, but didn't have the inclination.I still keep finding myself staring into space, with no thought. I wonder if u will go swimming. I should go. Hamper G would love it. Her dad took her and he's on crutches with his knees missing/mangled, but he had no concerns about what people thought. and i worry about a bit of fat on my stomach. stupid girl.really i need to sort myself out. sorry, this was a ps, and im off on one again. I gonna go and give myself a good talking to. . .
ReplyDeletex
Hi.
ReplyDeletePlease read your lycos email, from Hambonia.
:-)