I FAILED ANOTHER BREATHALYSER TEST THIS AFTERNOON. 0.65 when it ought to have been 0.5 or lower... I really don't get what's the point at 4pm being breathtested if I'm only going to fail it... of course I retook the test at 5pm and passed at only 0.35 though I had to go an entire hour bored and without cyder...
RODENT NEWS: Robos hiding in a corner (under cardboard lid)... Mice turfed out. These evil housemice now appear to be staging mousey jousting contests or duels at dawn UNDER MY BED. Complete with dying-squeaks sound effects. Very annoying creatures that they are. Also they peed all over my other jacket and it stank of mouse-piss so Mother Hubbs chucked it in her wash for me. How gross. It is like living in a barn in my house, honestly...
NOW ON TO CHINESE TAKEAWAY CURRY SAUCE. This is an English staple. Curry you must bear in mind, and I'm not being facetious here, is, after roast beef Yorkshire pudding, seasonable veg and gravy our national dish so the differences between different curries mean a lot here. Chinese curry is pretty low in chili or totally devoid. It has lots of turmeric and an oniony flavour. It adds a lot of savour to the plain chicken - onions - mushrooms (often but not always) - and peas stirfry upon which it is poured. Never in my life have I seen the sauce or a powder for it advertised or sold ... and I Googled for a recipe a couple of nights ago... without TOO much success... Nobody seemed to have a definitive version. Yes I could ask the local Chinese but they tend to be notoriously evasive when asked for cooking techniques or recipes. Surely someone has written an book giving away the secrets of British Chinese takeaway food (they have the knack of making it almost identical between diverse businesses the absolute length and bredth of this country. The menu is almost invariable as well... To be frank, I think most British Chinese takeaway food tastes of MSG+cardboard but the spicy dishes "curry" "blackbeansauce" and "satay" are the three I like... Chinese curry might be unknown in China (as Nicole subtly pointed out...) but it's surely an international takeaway phenomenon. I know this because my Teach Yourself Japanese has facsimile of a Japanese Chinese takeaway menu in Kanji and Kana and that has Chicken Curry Egg Fly Lice too!
I have had wonderful Japanese curry a couple of times at a Japanese restaurant in Soho called Zipangu.
I KNOW THE NAME FOR THE GENRE IN WHICH I'M WRITING (and spending a fortune on "wet ink roller balls/gel ink pens" etc in WH Smiths and Sainsbury's (Sainsbury's do exactly the same pen as WH Smith's own for £1.29 except Sainsbury's do THREE to a pack while stingy old WHSmiths only pack in ONE!!... yes, my writing is called a MISERY MEMOIR!! How evocative!! Well I'm trying to bust the genre by not being too selfpitying (real selfpity isn't something I'm that good at. Selfloathing - o yes! Genuine, heartfelt pity for myself, the way I might pity some crippled orphan from a Rwandan warzone - I only recall having that emotion just the once, and have never experienced it since...) Misery Memoirs are supposedly thee vogue of today which has really buoyed up my spirits.... I'm just hoping this "trendiness" will result in a seven-figure hard-soft deal with rights sold to America, Japan, Germany/everywhere else that's important... wahey!! Because I need a triplex atop Ontario Tower (or somewhere similar) ... just as long as there's room service from a linked-in five-star hotel, swimming pool in same building and sparkly views of London's glamorous diamondlike midnight skyline... Or, on the other hand if I could only get some PROPER place of my OWN where I can slam my door and NOBODY has ANY right to intrude without 48 hours' notice at least and where I can OWN A COMPUTER and have broadband and satellite TV etc etc and the things normal people have when they're doing OK. That's what I REALLY want... and to think the only way I can get any of this is by prostituting my lifestory... what is this world coming to ~??!?!?!?
Video of the Day: Owen and Mzee - Hippo and Tortoise Friends for Life...
Giant Bedbug Found Near Portuguese Beach... have a clickonthis someone please and tell me what on earth this revolting critter IS...
Visitor's Pictures of London "The Big Smoke" (as it used to be called about 2 generations ago before compulsory smokeless fuel was introduced to abolish London's "pea souper" megasmogs...
***
Beautiful German Alpine mountain trekking shots...
... on http://juergenmaier.blogspot.com ...
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Emigration blogs...
... to Germany ~ http://susa-back-in-germany.blogspot.com
... from Amsterdam to Adelaide, Aus ... ~ http://nicolemobile.blogspot.com ... usw...
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Amazing Nepali countryside shots... http://nepaliakash.blogspot.com
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Entertaining trip to the zoo:
http://lmclennan.blogspot.com/2007/11/lao-zoo.html
I used to get Curry Something at a Chinese restaurant in Atlanta and as I recall--and bear in mind I can't even remember what the curry was on--it was sort of pleasantly kind of sweet, and not the "knock you out of your chair"-effect that Chicken Vindaloo or some of the Indian curries have.
ReplyDeleteYeah that sounds about right... THAT is the kinda recipe I want
ReplyDeletehttp://www.wingyipstore.co.uk/product-092965.html
ReplyDeletego here and see! they have original Chinese curry sauce concentrate.
And you can get Bisto chip shop curry sauce granules. Which are probably different.
ReplyDeleteugh to that giant crustacian thingy .. wouldn't be surprised to see it served up as an expensive shellfish platter somewhere posh *!*
ReplyDeleteSo get those roller pens moving on your Misery Memoir your time is now!
blogger just did it to me again!!!!!
ReplyDeleteugh to that crustacian looking thingy but I wouldn't be at all surprised to see it served up on a seafood platter somewhere posh *!*
..... keep those roller ball pens moving across your Misery Memoir pages, your time to shine is upon you!
....bugger blogger again *!*
ReplyDeleteLiz: hang on let me have a look.. andt
ReplyDeleteBimbimbie: o that bloody blogger!
O that bloody blogger!! ;->...
That huge bedbug thing looks absolutely gross what on EARTH is it? It looks like a woodlouse crossed with a turtle... does ANYONE KNOW WHAT THAT THING IS.......
Well, here is a recipie for Chicken Vindaloo--
ReplyDeleteMaybe Chinese aren't as forthcoming because they are still mad about the Opium Wars?
I think you can just about stop any Indian dude on the street and ask him for a recipie for Chicken Vindaloo, and if he's not in too much of a hurry he will just give it to you--it's, as we academics say, a "lower context culture."
I had Jerk Kalamari Burritos in Montego Bay and that is about the most exotic thing I have ever had with curry powder in it...
Kerk Jalimani Bhurritos? That SOUNDS well exotic too... you're right about stopping any Indian on the street they might well give you the recipe. Chinese would just look at you like you were insane.
ReplyDeletethanks. but i'm a london resident, not a visitor.
ReplyDeleteo sorry!
ReplyDeletei thought i picked up from your tone that you were just visiting... ho-hum!!
In the States, the national meal is potato chips and beer... and don't mess it up with anything green unless it's green beer on St. Patricks Day. If you're lucky you might get a hotdog too.
ReplyDeleteIf I recall correctly, the national dish in Canada is cheese fries with a side of beer. Now that's good eats and it thickens the blood too.
Sounds like you need to do something about the living arrangements there Gledwood. Might I suggest a remodel with a can of gasoline and a match. Well that is if you have enough money to buy a can of gasoline. At least it gives you incentive to write. Look out Ontario Tower, Gledwood is moving on up.
How was your mountainous cheese sandwich? Did it come with a summit register?
Maybe Congress should not ban waterboarding interrogation by the CIA until we can get the recipe for Chinese Curry Prawns out of a Chinese guy.
ReplyDelete(We'll make him eat the first prawn just to make sure the Chinese guy is telling the truth--I already thought of that...)
I am allergic to curry, it makes me faint..no really it does! Never tired a Chinese curry but don't think I'll try my luck. I hav eno idea what that bug is but do you think it was responsible for that bitten toe at the bottom of that post?
ReplyDeleteI love curry of any kind. I buy it in powder, paste - whatever. We get these little "cubes" of it that are handy (I freeze them), but I guess it's Indian curry.
ReplyDeleteBlackbean's good too...but I agree about the MSG/cardboard reference.
Off track here...but Gled, do you have a camera? I was reading your last post and I can really picture you (pardon the pun) getting into photography and "capturing" things for your blog.
ReplyDeleteJust curious.
and last question...is that new picture you holding your furry friend? Or is it one from the internet?
ReplyDeleteHi Gleds, I can't eat satay...peanut allergy, I love Chinese food (without nuts) but my all time favourite food is Italian. Oh joy!
ReplyDeleteAs for your memoirs, regardless of what genre is hung on the book, if it inspires someone...that's the most important thing. So...keep writing and don't get discouraged. I, for one, want to read your book and I bet a few other bloggers do, too.
Take care
Hi Gleds
ReplyDeleteMay I ask why you have a breathaliser? Are you trying to kick booze too? Do keep writing your memoir as it will be fascinating. Keep your eyes fixed on your goal: a better life. I am confident you will get there if you keep trying.
all the best
x
Molson:... hang on I thought the American national dish was a Big Mac..??
ReplyDeleteZen Wizzard: yeah they should definitely suffocate some Chinese takeaway person to get ALL the recipes outta them! Do you know it wasn't until my 22nd year that I finally twigged that (British - I can't vouch for any other countries) Chinese takeaway is based on 4 meats (ie chicken, beef, pork, prawns - sometimes duck as the 5th) in about 20 recipes with about 4 different sauces potentially poured over them hence the famous "number 53 with 26 and 57A please" ordering system. I always order with words and watch closely as they scribble out the traditional (not vulgar Maoist simplified mainland version) Cantonese characters out...
Kirkby: Lots of people are allergic to curry. But usually it gives them rampant quacking farts followed by gushing pantfilling diarrhoea!
Debs: 1st things 1st no it's just an internet photo. My hands aren't that red. Partially because I've hammered the veins in them so they're sleek and pale... like a vampire's hands. Or a James Bond's baddie's butler's hands...
ReplyDeleteAs for the camera thing I've thought of that alot. I actually have a digital camera but it needs a charger that Jessops the local camera shop insist will cost me about $100 US which is REALLY taking the peepee
Pussinboots: I just hope it sells enough to get me high definition telly, satellite dishes, a proper home and money to travel and shut the blaring ugly cancered old world out
Lostgirl: The breathalyser is IN the drugs clinic and they use it just to be pissy and take advantage of people's weakenesses and to be jobsworthy. Know what I mean. It has nothing to do with driving or the po-lice...
Hi Gleds
ReplyDeleteI just re read my question to you and it came out a bit wrong. I really didn't think you'd be drunk in charge of a car or playing up the police. Sorry as I am not here to challenge you or make you justify yourself. Are your baby hamsters being good today? Its a lovely sunny day where I am but guess what I feel crappy! Hope you are doing ok.
byee
No I'm fine don't worry... I know you didn't think it was to do with driving I thought you thought I had one at home it is the clinic who have one. I would be fascinated to know how accurate it was though!!!
ReplyDeleteMmmmmmmm, I love blackbean sauce. A couple of weeks ago I made roast chicken and basted it with blackbean sauce and stuffed the bird with orange....very tasty indeed. I just completely zoned out at my desk here at work and had a quick day dream about blackbean.
ReplyDeleteKeep the writing up and I will cross my fingers that you finally get your chance to move on up, ya know....finally get a peice of the pie, like the Jeffersons did. Did you get the Jefferson's over there? I am completely procrastinating on your blog because I don't want to work ;)
-Eileen
That reminds me of a joke:
ReplyDeleteA Chinese guy jumps in bed and says to his wife, "I wanna 69!"
The wife says, "Why do you want Beef & Broccoli now?"
(Buh duh bump...tish!)
Eileen: Did you like my London advice? Was it useful?
ReplyDelete... I'm glad my blog is worth of your time/anyone's time...
... Jeffersons?
No idea though!!!
Zenwizzard!: Wah wah I like!
Hi Gledwood,
ReplyDeleteThanks for posting my link.
Oh, I see what you meant about the curry sauce comment at mine now. I've never come across abook about Chinese takeaway food but someone who worked in one did once tell me they put lime marmalade in. I'm sure that's a great help! Glad you've got a genre - you must have a genre....
ReplyDeleteNepali: that's no prob...
ReplyDeleteWelshcakes: marmelade... no that would NOT make proper Chinese curry at ALL..!
You gotta make it quite oniony and farily sweet and that is about the long and the short of it and that is about ALL!!!
Prostituting your life story? People have been doing it for hundreds of years.
ReplyDeleteYorkshire pudding...yum!
Bom dia a você meu amigo falando Português! Sua página surgiu muito aleatoriamente na internet e pensei que gostaria de dizer olá! Eu faço um blog também! Http://gledwood2.blogspot.com é o lugar para ser! Lá você pode ler a minha linha diário secreto diários e mais íntimos confessionals! Divirta - se! Todos os muito melhor para você! De Gledwood "Vol. 2" ;->...
ReplyDelete