Sunday, May 16, 2010

A stab at Dutch...

I'VE HAD A GO at writing bestselling fiction in Dutch... Here, for your entertainment is a story about my late hamsters Pandable and Itchy and the never-existed cairn terrier, Sparky:

Deze ochtend lopen de Syrische hamster Pandable en de roborovski dwerghamster Itchy langs de Vondelstraat. Daar voldoen zij aan de cairn terrier Sparky.
"Goede morgen, hoe gaat het met je?" zegt Pandable.
"Zeer goed, dank je," zegt Sparky. "En hoe gaat het met jou, Itchy. Ben je krank?"
"Och ja!" zegt Itchy. Ik heb mijten in de vacht. Ik ga naar de dierenarts. Ik heb een afspraak om tien uur. Ne hoor! Ik moet nu gaan. Het bont is well jeukende!"
"OK, tot ziens," zegt Sparky.
"Tot later," zeggen Itchy en Pandable.


This is what it actually means. It's all in the present tense to be arty. (Not that I'm unable to use the past tenses in Dutch or anything...!)

This morning, Pandable the Syrian hamster and Itchy the roborovski pygmy hamster are trotting down the Vondelstraat (in Amsterdam). There they meet Sparky, the cairn terrier.
"Good morning, how are you?" says Pandable.
"Very well, thank you," says Sparky. "And how are you, Itchy? Are you ill?"
"Oh yes," says Itchy. I have mites in my coat! I am going to the vet's. I have a ten o'clock appointment. Now I must go, my fur is well itchy!"
"OK, see you later," says Sparky.
"Later," say Itchy and Pandable.


I ran it through Google translate, which produced this masterpiece!

This morning walk Pledges Able Syrian hamsters and dwarf hamsters along the Itchy Vondelstraat. Then they meet the cairn terrier Sparky.
"Good morning, how are you?" Able says Gage.
"Very well, thank you," says Sparky. And how are you, Itchy. Are you sick? "
"Oh yes!" Itchy says. I have mites in the fur. I go to the vet. I have an appointment at ten o'clock. Ne hear! I must go now. The fur is well itchy! "
"OK, goodbye," says Sparky.
"Later," said Able Property and itchy.

11 comments:

  1. Wow that's the best translation yet! Usually you run that stuff through and end up with total gobbledygook. Looks like you wrote near perfect Dutch! Well except for Able Property that is! Hahah!

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  2. Grinning at Able Property ... Pandable has a secret life in real estate*!*

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  3. Cute story. Translated pretty well I think.

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  4. I think "pand" must mean something in Dutch, though I've not looked up what it might be yet...

    I had a look at the online version of the biggest-selling newspaper in Thailand to see what they had to say about the recent unrest and Google's translation came back TERRIBLE! They are far, far better with European languages, even if they do come up with the odd howler!

    PS I did write that story myself. I only use Google as a dictionary. If you relied on it to translate entire sentences it would give it to you with words all the wrong way round!

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  5. Hi Gledwood! This is why I don't try to learn another language via the internet. I would most assuredly insult someone with my translations! Thanks for stopping by my blog. I am looking forward to reading yours.

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  6. Google is the best translator ! Each time I want to laugh I put an English test to have it translated into French or German and then I laugh my head off !
    BTW C&A's origin was Dutch. The company was founded by brothers Clemens and August Brenninkmeijer in 1841 as a Dutch textile company. Now I read that the headquarters are in Brussels and Düsseldorf !! and they closed down in the UK. (thanks Wikipedia !)

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  7. Stacie: You might have to plough through mine a bit to get to something interesting, I do tend to go on about the obsession of the week, drop it, then next week I'm on to the next obsession...

    Gattina: I've put stuff through German to English for my family and the translations don't seem TOO terrible... It's more Asian languages like Thai and especially Japanese it just cannot seem to deal with and comes out with the most bizarre nonsense ever...

    I found it to be a good dictionary if you need a word in European you key in "the dog" "the table" etc and you get the word complete with gender.

    I couldn't use it to cheat with the Dutch because it seems not to understand how Dutch sentences invert, the way German ones do. Though my word order was only a guess!

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  8. Hello Gledwood:-)

    Yes, i am the sister of Vincent. You've wrote a piece of good dutch on my blog. Well done!

    Good luck with youre dutch, you are doing very well.

    Greetings from Ilse-)

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  9. Good job on that. You are a natural with languages.

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  10. Ilse: dank je wel!

    Syd: Do you know I didn't used to think I was any good at all... this is down to the British system of language acquisition and the accompanying attitude. I hope I'm OK now. I've got a sparkly silver notebook just for NEDERLANDS/Dutch and hopefully it will be full of the most advanced vocabulary lists : about thermonuclaer warhead design and higher Kaddai-Thai/Miao-Yao phonetics (!) before the year's out...
    Ha-har!!

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