I DON'T FEEL QUITE SO LOW & HORRIBLE as I speak; I'm hoping this is a "real" improvement. If I sound a little overly concerned about feeling a bit "blue", I should explain that I have spent years of my life in various grades of depression and when it starts to come back it terrifies me because it can sometimes go on for a full year on and off. But mostly ON. And I haven't always got on with those antidepressant medications they dish out like sweeties at times....
Having said all this I've resolved to go to a doctor and talk over everything that bothers me because I have loads of silly health probs which I won't go into they're not embarrassing but trivial ... this is an odd thing about junkies; you on the one hand have to be very much in touch with your body, lose the embarrassment eg of using bathroom with door open (because of being in people's houses where people have to walk in and out to get eg toilet paper to wipe off blood, type of situations). But on the other, and this struck me so forcibly at my old methadone pharmacy (because you pick it up from a pharmacy here, it's only a "clinic" for fortnightly (lack of) progress reviews). Anyhow this pharmacist was so incredibly slow I ended up every day mixed up in a queue of old ladies and people with coughs and colds and sick children and kids with nits etc etc. It frankly astonished me the petty complaints people came in and were willing to spend money, basically just to get a nice little bottle of something that makes them feel they're taking care of themself. Many a time I've looked on in amazement as a businessman type person (and we all know men are meant to suffer colds worse than women. That is a fact of life.) would spend £18 or £25 on a common cold. A day remedy. A night remedy. Something to numb the throat. Some lip chap thing. Or whatever. My mind boggled at the needless billions flowing into pharmaceutical conglomerates' coffers all in the name of soothing the population's glorified hypochondria ...
Glad you're feeling less "blue" What a good point you've made here; just one thing ...why no old men in the queue....guess they've all sent their poor old sick wives out....typical.....LOL. The cost of these over the counter cures? is exhorbitant.....I'll stick to my "rub down with a wet kipper"...much cheaper.
ReplyDeleteyou know what??....99% of it is crap and doesn't work. Or that's what I find. I tend to look for natural remedies and more a more holistic approach. But, when all else fails...
ReplyDeleteI do hope you have some good days. And I think many who are depressed (that I know of anyways) are actually borderline geniuses who find it all too mundane and meaningless. The stimulation just isn't there. Maybe not you, but some depressed people that I know of.
or maybe you ;)
ReplyDelete(and i don't mean the fleeting, soap opera "boo hoo he left me" flash in the pan depression. I mean the deep rooted in your soul can't find any satisfaction/motivation/happiness depression. The kind that attaches itself to you and won't let go)
ReplyDeleteI really feel what your saying about the anti-depressants. Horrible reactions to some, Lexapro, that shit was pure evil man. I was seeing and hearing things, sweats, the whole kit and caboodle.
ReplyDeletethe school recently wanted to put my 15 year old on them or kick her out. they lost that battle.
ReplyDeleteThe over-the-counter remedies are not where the Pharmas, Industrial juggernauts that they are, make their killing. For example, Pfizer, the manufacturer of Viagra, is now seeing slumps in it's massive profit-making because the rest of the market has opened up to the generic production of the big cash cow of a little blue pill. It's not a case of share-the-wealth but one of greed coming full circle to bite the ass of the greedy.
ReplyDeleteCheck out this movie "The Secret" at http://thesecret.tv/home.html. Understanding the law of attraction is a no brainer especially in the context of how it brings about the things we do not want. Consider changing the color of your blog. Though quite fetching it IS blue and perhaps an extension of your over-riding focus on being blue (understandably so given your history). Change your focus to being happy. Change your palette on your blog to reflect that.
Breath in pink--breath out blue
-- Funny Face
Best up my friend,
WS
I used the expression "blue" but 2 me depression is a burnt-out post-neuclear blackness.
ReplyDeleteBlue to me is a warm and happy colour. The colour of the sea, the sky. Powder blue. Clean bright blue. I love blue. It's not depressing to me.
& re medication I'm glad I never got put on that Seroxat/paroxetine crap. They've banned it for under 18s a few years ago here & there's a court case in the news bc of this minor who was put on it & died.
ReplyDeleteI mean, what is the point of antidepressants that cause an INCREASE (even if only temporary) in SUICIDAL THOUGHTS. That is pure danger. To ANYone of whatever age, who's already seriously low enough (unless they're just a medication fan) to be in need of mood medications.
Sometimes I do think the DOCTORS are the crazy ones.
Did you ever hear this joke:
What do you call it when you talk to God? Praying.
What do you call it when God talks to you? Psychosis.
What do you call someone who IS God? A psychiatrist.
Not sure how it is in the UK, but here in the States, many of our TV commercials are from prescription drugs targeted to alleviate minor problems. "Talk to your doctor about _____" is a joke any more!
ReplyDeleteSomeday you and I will have to have a chat about depression and what is out there for treatment.
They are not allowed to advertise prescription drugs at all to the general public and certainly not on TV. The only ads you get for prescription drugs I've ever come across in UK publications are in stuff like the Lancet that I've found on train seats. Stuff like ...
ReplyDelete"If you could take one antibiotic to a desert island, make sure it's our one"...!
Yes seriously. That's pretty verbatim what they said.
Of course we get loads of ads for "proprietary" OTC medicines. Trying to convince us that one brand of 500mg paracetamol headache pill is somehow going to do a better job than another 500mg paracetamol product. I mean, how RIDICULOUS.
The Lancet being of course a doctors' medical journal. Don't know how well known that one is.
ReplyDelete