I'VE FOUND a new internet cafe that hopefully lets you publish posts after posting them. The one I had been using before had something ikky about their computers. So, a 20 minute walk later... and I'm here. Just around from crack corner. But I'm feeling strong. I'm truly fed up of all drugs; the last time was "the last time". I am resolved.

There's not a lot to say today. I hadn't had much sleep and had woken up early when I posted the last thing, which is why I was so chirpy. Later that day I came down with a crash-bang of gross proportions. That was the last time I tried drugs to raise my mood and it didn't work, they don't work, I'm fed up with it all so I'm now as clean as you can be on 80mg of methadone.

[I took the drugs after, not before the crash. The good mood was a natural high.]

Next week I have a dr's appointment about getting back to normal consumption. I only have to drink my methadone supervised because I was transferred to a new clinic and they do that with all their "clients". Last appointment I ranted on about how much of a drudge it is trudging to the chemist every day at your lowest point. I always used to drink the juice BEFORE setting out. So I started the day with it working full-on. Hopefully they will hear me on this point. And reduce me down down down again.

Arghkh I feel like a stuck record, there isn't much else to say. My computer is still sick I don't know whether it will ever be OK again or whether I will have to buy a new one. I'm saving as we speak.

I would like to get a hamster. I would like to move house. All these things are supposed to be happening, but they don't. There was supposed to be some meeting with my housing manager this week. I'm not sure whether I was supposed to be there or whether it has been and gone... who knows? I have to dash off now in case I get disconnected.