News Review: Queen's Crown Scandal; Doherty-Moss; Drunken Wedding Horseride

HER MAJESTY THE QUEEN was seriously not amused when, during an official Palace portrait shoot, the American photographer Annie Liebowitz suggested that the Queen, already drest in full Royal regailia might wish to remove her crown because the "garter robe" she already had on (a great black robe with gold "mayoral" style chain, rosette and imperial looking platinum star that would have befitted Queen Victoria in her "widow" phase) was already so "extraordinary". The Queen cut Liebowitz short before she could breathe this last word and snapped: "Too dressy? What do you think this is?"

I agree totally with The Sun Says (p6):

Crown and out:
BEING Queen of all you survey is a serious business.
So one is rightly brassed orf when asked by some American snapper to remove one's crown - the ultimate badge of monarchy.
Hats off to Her Maj for saying NO.

Hear hear!

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PS: Thanks to Ruth; Shaz; Puss-in-Boots; for pointing me to the following BBC News Update that shed some more truthful light upon the matter. Click on BBC to view the 3-minute update ...
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KATE MOSS HAS TORCHED AN EXTENSIVE STASH OF LOVE LETTERS, POEMS AND SONGS WRITTEN TO HER BY JUNKIE LOVER PETE DOHERTY.
Relations eventually came to a "head" when a vast pile of cash Moss had stashed in her palatial residence went suspiciously AWOL.
"Poor" Pete, is seemingly living hand to mouth. While Kate earns a reported £10,000,000 a year, which would put her 2nd behind £33,000,000 a year Gisele Bundchen in the top model stakes (who else earns more than Kate but less than Gisele? I can't think of anyone. And I always keep half an ear open to celebrity pay claims. They kind of make my breakfast. Along with the rest of the tat in the Sun newspaper, a can of White Star cyder, at least four cigarettes and frequently in certain times past, a juicy shot of brown heroin....
.. OK let me finish that sentence. While Kate earns a reported £10,000,000 before taxes, agents' fees and other expenses (ie she takes home less than £5,000,000 a year. Boo-hoo!) Poor Pete Doherty went straight to a "travellers' site" under a Shepherd's Bush flyover (reportedly to stay there; but I think to score and use) and had all his guitars etc dumped in a tower block in Hackney (hardly North-East London's most salubrious "quarter")... Having put out so many records, gone on so many tours, has he really got nowhere better to stay? I'm flabberghasted. I mean, I might be bad at budgeting on a pittance, but if I had a few hundred a week (surely he earns at least that) then I'd have the nous to buy up Premium Bonds, stash the money in bank accounts and otherwise invest at least some of it ... come on!
Premium Bonds, by the way, are a piece of genius. Boring old government bonds. You must buy a minimum £100 worth at a time. But all interest, instead of being accrued and scattered stingily into every "account" at a measy four point something percent ... is instead all lumped together, divided into one million pound lot, then quarter million and hundred thousand, fifty thousand and so on down to £100 and £50 chunks... a machine called ERNIE generates random numbers and if these match any currently held bonds ~ hey! You're a winner. That is investment genius! When I have £30,000 to spare (sadly that is the maximum investment) I know what I'm going to do with it ...
OK and back to the story:
But hats off to Kate for being strong enough to see this was never going to work before she married the loser.
What ye North American bloggers seem to miss in your "how does he get away with it?" posts is that he doesn't!
Only last week he was in court on repeated drug possession (heroin, ketamine, crack ~ arguably the three strongest most mindbending substances known to man) charges and for driving a vehicle for which he was uninsured! The judge said to him basically the choice is yours. Keep on using and you're definitely going to jail. Detox and come back to me (on a certain date) and we'll see what we can do.
Doherty has been in jail once already ~ yes, for drug possession and related offences. He does not wish to return.
Is it his funny face and penchant for knobbish hats that gets him in repeated trouble? Does he not know the gentle art of actually stashing ones "stash"? I don't know. Presumably all Metropolitan Police officers have a bounty they can claim for "nicking Doherty" ~ a £50 cash prize or something. I've never known him to be "nicked" clean ...
So out with the Doherty; in with the new.
One question remains: what on earth did she see in him in the first place~??

AND LAST BUT BY NO MEANS LEAST...some

Hey, you can count on The Sun to phrase it best (bottom left, p7):

The paragraphs below are an excercise in great tabloid journalism. If you think Sun journalists "can't write" then just you try telling the following tale so succinctly:

Horse 'n' Carnage:
A DRUNK woman hijacked a horse-drawn wedding carriage and ran down a one-legged man on a mobility scooter.
One-tonne shire horses Charlie and Buster were outside a pub when the woman and her daughter climbed on and whipped them into bolting.
They knocked Bob Tiller off his scooter and ran over the nags' owner.
Bob, 63, suffered a fractured wrist outside the Good Companion in Peacehaven, East Sussex.
The horses got tangled up on a Ford Fiesta which they wrote off ("totalled"), along with the £10,000 carriage. Police appealed for witnesses.

My Kate Moss Pete Doherty Dream

PERHAPS THIS WAS SPARKED BY THE CONFIRMATION in today's paper that I got at 7am that they had indeed split ... I knew this already. Don't know how. Somehow I just knew she would only tolerate "romancing" a using junkie for so long. Especially considering those scandals of her own ...

The dream began on a sort of industrial boat with a helecopter port on top. Kate (and I (? I don't recall)) had flown onto the boat by helecopter. We were sailing through some marshy enormous industrial no-man's land like the Hook of Holland with all cranes in the background and sea birds all over the place. Kate Moss was talking to her freind and I was so intrigued I suppose I must have ended up following her.

Next scene is in rehab, where I met Pete Doherty. He was much nicer and "cooler" (by this I mean less arrogant and more together) than he seems in the press. A Jamaican rasta grass dealer appeared with a huge bundle of grass on a dinner plate, offered it to Pete, who said yes and just slid it under his hat!

There was a wasps nest in the corner with wasps the size of budgies constantly coming in and out.

All manner of underhandedness was going on at this rehab. Principally, I suppose, to do with using drugs. But I didn't really want anything to do with it. It was as if I was grabbing hold of the carpet and yet someone was trying to tear it from me.

I remember I had this notebook that was supposedly important to me. One person in particular was trying to be really nice to me to get a look in this book. Then a woman came in, put her hand right up the wasps' nest and produced another notebook. It was Pete Doherty's diary. "Oh! He only had two yesterday!" (Two hits of heroin, I suppose.) "Oooo, bless!"

And that was my Kate Moss Pete Doherty Dream.

Sorry... should I have embroidered it for the reading public? Surely it is bizarre enough...!