NO I HAVEN'T LITERALLY GOT NITS OR ANYTHING... (not this year. Though I did catch them REPEATEDLY several years ago from the local bedredlocked, caravan-dwelling tattooed and pierced "new age travelling" "crusties".... They might even have been body lice then, only I washed my clothes far to frequently (like every single DAY!! ever to find out...)
NO I AM MISERABLE. Because I HATE METHADONE. Spent all day experiencing flashes of fever. It was a horribly clammy day but most of the time I felt like I was outside in thickest fog in shirtsleeves. When actually I was indoors with the heater on full blast. Then suddenly I'd break into the most perverse overheated sweats, so bad I had to strip off nearly naked. Then I was freezing again...
I'd done well over 100mg of methadone which is supposedly more than enough. Until I found an extra 20mg in the back of my fridge I thought I was going to go nuts...
Now suddenly the weather, from being so unbearably horrible I couldn't face going outside, feels remarkably clement. And all because of this magic methadone inside me...
My keys are NOWHERE to be found. Yes I've checked fridge, freezer, toilet, shower, behind, inside everything including shoes, clothes everything (as I said they were deliberately bulked out to MAKE THEM EASY TO FIND... yet to no avail...) I don't have spares as the landlord insists on frequently changing the locks. Which is a good thing really. But not in a situation like this.
No I am NOT IN A GOOD MOOD TODAY. The junkie life is one coated in Teflon. There's so little to hang on to, the drugs become everything.
Being on heroin is like being a poor man shut out in the rain gazing longingly in to a posh restaurant. All that separates you is one thin plate glass. And yet that glass is everything. As soon as you take the heroin you're on the other side of that window and so smug you feel you'll never be rained on again (though you know it you can barely ever feel it)... and so it goes on.
Oh roll on tomorrow. I really want to get some gear.
THESE ARE MY 2 FAVOURITE BOND THEMES
~ From Russia with Love (film intro without vocal)
~ From Russia with Love (stills montage with vocal)
~ Goldfinger (film intro with vocal)
Lent 6 - Today I am grateful as I am every day for my 'happy' pill. I can safely say it changed my life. I could write a long blog post about being medicated and wh...
2 hours ago