HAMSTERS & HEROIN: Not all junkies are purse-snatching grandmother-killing psychos. I'm keeping this blog to bear witness to that fact.


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I used to take heroin at every opportunity, for over 10 years, now I just take methadone which supposedly "stabilizes" me though I feel more destabilized than ever before despite having been relatively well behaved since late November/early December 2010... and VERY ANGRY about this when I let it get to me so I try not to.

I was told by a mental health nurse that my heroin addiction was "self medication" for a mood disorder that has recently become severe enough to cause psychotic episodes. As well as methadone I take antipsychotics daily. Despite my problems I consider myself a very sane person. My priority is to attain stability. I go to Narcotics Anonymous because I "want what they have" ~ Serenity.

My old blog used to say "candid confessions of a heroin and crack cocaine addict" how come that one comes up when I google "heroin blog" and not this one. THIS IS MY BLOG. I don't flatter myself that every reader knows everything about me and follows closely every single word every day which is why I repeat myself. Most of that is for your benefit not mine.

This is my own private diary, my journal. It is aimed at impressing no-one. It is kept for my own benefit to show where I have been and hopefully to put off somebody somewhere from ever getting into the awful mess I did and still cannot crawl out of. Despite no drugs. I still drink, I'm currently working on reducing my alcohol intake to zero.

If you have something to say you are welcome to comment. Frankness I can handle. Timewasters should try their own suggestions on themselves before wasting time thinking of ME.

PS After years of waxing and waning "mental" symptoms that made me think I had depression and possibly mild bipolar I now have found out I'm schizoaffective. My mood has been constantly "cycling" since December 2010. Mostly towards mania (an excited non-druggy "high"). For me, schizoaffective means bipolar with (sometimes severe)
mania and flashes of depression (occasionally severe) with bits of schizophrenia chucked on top. You could see it as bipolar manic-depression with sparkly knobs on ... I'm on antipsychotic pills but currently no mood stabilizer. I quite enjoy being a bit manic it gives the feelings of confidence and excitement people say they use cocaine for. But this is natural and it's free, so I don't see my "illness" as a downer. It does, however, make life exceedingly hard to engage with...

PPS The "elevated mood" is long gone. Now I'm depressed. Forget any ideas of "happiness" I have given up heroin and want OFF methadone as quick as humanly possible. I'm fed up of being a drug addict. Sick to death of it. I wanna be CLEAN!!!

Attack of the Furry Entertainers!

Attack of the Furry Entertainers!

Wednesday, April 14, 2010

The Tale of Hachi

Chūgen Hachikō
忠犬ハチ公 means the faithful dog Hachi. Hachi means "eight" in Japanese.

This true story is famous in Japan. In the 1930s. Hachi, who later research showed to be one of only 30 pure-bred Akita dogs in Japan, was a puppydog in transit from the Northern Japanese farm where he was born to a new owner in the city. The crate in which he was travelling fell and sprang open at Tokyo station and the dog escaped and was found trotting the streets by a kindly professor from Tokyo University.

Unable to trace the dog's new owner, Ueno Hidesaburō
上野 英三郎, professor of Agricultural Studies at Tokyo University, took Hachi home and devotedly looked after him. Each morning the Professor would walk to the local station with Hachi in tow. There they said goodbye and Hachi trotted back home to re-appear each evening at Shibuya Station in time for the Professor's train.

One day Professor Ueno was stricken with a heart attack while at work and died. Hachi was rehomed but continually escaped, trotting back to the Professor's old home. This went on for months until the dog realized that Professor Ueno didn't live there any more.

From then on Hachi showed up at Shibuya Station
渋谷駅, the third-busiest railway station in Tokyo, every evening on time for his master's train. He became a fixture at the station, ever watching and waiting in hope of his master's return.

Regular commuters grew to recognize the dog, and kept him well-fed with tasty treats as he continued his vigil.

The Faithful Furry continued to show up every evening on time and to wait patiently for the late Professor. This went on for NINE YEARS.

During his lifetime Hachi became a cause célèbre and a national symbol of faithfulness and hope. When he died his body was stuffed and put in the National Science Museum in Tokyo, where he remains on display to this day.

Hachi's story was filmed in Japanese in 1987 as Hachikō Monogatari
ハチ公物語. In 2009 a Hollywood version was released starring Richard Gere as a caucasian Professor Ueno.

This screen is a montage of clips from the Japanese original, set to music and telling the complete story in three-&-a-half minutes.

You can watch the complete 1987 film Hachiko Monogatari on my Animals Crackers pets blog by clicking here.

Photos 1: the actual Hachi; 2 bronze statue outside Shibuya station; 3 Hachi's stuffed body at the National Science Museum of Japan, Tokyo.

In Memory of Hachi
Tribute montage. I think those doggieharnesses that fit on their back like a bumblebee wings holder are really cute:
BTW doesn't the cover image look just like a little shiba-inu. Shiba-inu, BTW, means "brushwood doggie"...


Sarcastic Bastard said...

I sincerely hope they will stuff my body and put it in the National Museum when I croak.

Love you, Gledds.

Syd said...

I don't want to be skinned or stuffed. Just a simple cremation will do--smoke molecules on the wind.
Nice story about the Shiba.

molson said...

Hachi sure was a loyal inu. Maybe they should have put Hachi with the Professor.

Lone Grey Squirrel said...

Thanks for the story although I think it is a sad thing that such faithfulness is rewarded by being stuffed and put on display.

Baino said...

What a sweet and sad story. My Lily would get into a car with ANYONE so don't talk to me bout doggie loyalty. Then when she runs away and I have to go pick her up the level of recognition is palpable. I just don't get it. Nah ..I'm happy to rot and fertilise

Gledwood said...


Tea N. Crumpet said...

My dawg is quite loyal but has assumed ownership of my house and now barks at me when I get too close to his things which happen to be next to my bed.

Gledwood said...

Come on folks! Stuffing the dog was meant to be a great honour!! Did you know they even have a Hachiko entrance at Shibuya station these days... shows in just how high esteem the Faithful Furry is held by the Japanese nation...

Gledwood said...

Crumpet... a dog barking when you "come too near his things"... what doggiethings might those be? I didn't know dogs HAD possessions... except their dindins, which they bolt, to stop any other swine getting it... or their little ball that they scurry after down the park... or those tree branches I saw some tiny terriers carting home, heads held high and highly self-important expresssions on their furry faces the other day... highly entertaining ~~!!



Heroin Shortage: News

If you are looking for the British Heroin Drought post, click here; the latest word is in the comments.

Christiane F

"Wir, Kinder vom Bahnhoff Zoo" by "Christiane F", memoir of a teenage heroin addict and prostitute, was a massive bestseller in Europe and is now a set text in German schools. Bahnhoff Zoo was, until recently, Berlin's central railway station. A kind of equivalent (in more ways than one) to London's King's Cross... Of course my local library doesn't have it. So I'm going to have to order it through a bookshop and plough through the text in German. I asked my druggieworker Maple Syrup, who is Italiana how she learned English and she said reading books is the best way. CHRISTIANE F: TRAILER You can watch the entire 120-min movie in 12 parts at my Random blog. Every section EXCEPT part one is subtitled in English (sorry: but if you skip past you still get the gist) ~ to watch it all click HERE.

To See Gledwood's Entire Blog...

DID you find my blog via a Google or other search? Are you stuck on a post dated some time ago? Do you want to read Gledwood Volume 2 right from "the top" ~ ie from today?
If so click here and you'll get to the most recent post immediately!

Drugs Videos

Most of these come from my Random blog, which is an electronic scrapbook of stuff I thought I might like to view at some time or other. For those who want to view stuff on drugs I've collected the very best links here. Unless otherwise stated these are full-length features, usually an hour or more.

If you have a slow connexion and are unused to viewing multiscreen films on Youtube here's what to do: click the first one and play on mute, stopping and starting as it does. Then, when it's done, click on Repeat Play and you get the full entertainment without interruption. While you watch screen one, do the same to screens 2, 3 and so on. So as each bit finishes, the next part's ready and waiting.

Mexican Black Tar Heroin: "Dark End"

Khun Sa, whose name meant Prince Prosperous, had been, before his death in the mid 2000s, the world's biggest dealer in China White Heroin: "Lord of the Golden Triangle"

In-depth portrait of the Afghan heroin trade at its very height. Includes heroin-lab bust. "Afghanistan's Fateful Harvest"

Classic miniseries whose title became a catchphrase for the misery of life in East Asian prison. Nicole Kidman plays a privileged middle-class girl set up to mule heroin through Thai customs with the inevitable consequences. This is so long it had to be posted in two parts. "Bangkok Hilton 1" (first 2 hours or so); "Bangkok Hilton 2" (last couple of hours).

Short film: from tapwater-clear H4 in the USA to murky black Afghan brown in Norway: "Heroin Addicts Speak"

Before his untimely death this guy kept a video diary. Here's the hour-long highlights as broadcast on BBC TV: "Ben: Diary of a Heroin Addict". Thanks to Noah for the original link.

Some of the most entertaining scenes from Britain's top soap (as much for the poor research as anything else). Not even Phil Mitchell would go from nought to multi-hundred pound binges this fast: "Phil Mitchell on Crack" (just over 5 minutes).

Scientist lady shows us how to cook up gear: "How Much Citric?" Lucky cow: her brown is 70% purity! Oddly we never see her actually do her hit... maybe she got camera shy...

And lastly:

German documentary following a life from teenage addiction to untimely death before the age of 30. The decline in this girl's appearance is truly shocking. "Süchtig: Protokoll einer Hilflosigkeit". Sorry no subtitles; this is here for anyone learning German who's after practice material a little more gripping than Lindenstraße!

Nosey Quiz! Have you ever heard voices when you weren't high on drugs?

Manic Magic

Manic Magic

Gledwood Volume 2: A Heroin Addict's Blog

Copyright 2011 by Gledwood