HAMSTERS & HEROIN: Not all junkies are purse-snatching grandmother-killing psychos. I'm keeping this blog to bear witness to that fact.

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DIARY OF A SLOWLY RECOVERING HEROIN ADDICT

I used to take heroin at every opportunity, for over 10 years, now I just take methadone which supposedly "stabilizes" me though I feel more destabilized than ever before despite having been relatively well behaved since late November/early December 2010... and VERY ANGRY about this when I let it get to me so I try not to.

I was told by a mental health nurse that my heroin addiction was "self medication" for a mood disorder that has recently become severe enough to cause psychotic episodes. As well as methadone I take antipsychotics daily. Despite my problems I consider myself a very sane person. My priority is to attain stability. I go to Narcotics Anonymous because I "want what they have" ~ Serenity.

My old blog used to say "candid confessions of a heroin and crack cocaine addict" how come that one comes up when I google "heroin blog" and not this one. THIS IS MY BLOG. I don't flatter myself that every reader knows everything about me and follows closely every single word every day which is why I repeat myself. Most of that is for your benefit not mine.

This is my own private diary, my journal. It is aimed at impressing no-one. It is kept for my own benefit to show where I have been and hopefully to put off somebody somewhere from ever getting into the awful mess I did and still cannot crawl out of. Despite no drugs. I still drink, I'm currently working on reducing my alcohol intake to zero.

If you have something to say you are welcome to comment. Frankness I can handle. Timewasters should try their own suggestions on themselves before wasting time thinking of ME.

PS After years of waxing and waning "mental" symptoms that made me think I had depression and possibly mild bipolar I now have found out I'm schizoaffective. My mood has been constantly "cycling" since December 2010. Mostly towards mania (an excited non-druggy "high"). For me, schizoaffective means bipolar with (sometimes severe)
mania and flashes of depression (occasionally severe) with bits of schizophrenia chucked on top. You could see it as bipolar manic-depression with sparkly knobs on ... I'm on antipsychotic pills but currently no mood stabilizer. I quite enjoy being a bit manic it gives the feelings of confidence and excitement people say they use cocaine for. But this is natural and it's free, so I don't see my "illness" as a downer. It does, however, make life exceedingly hard to engage with...

PPS The "elevated mood" is long gone. Now I'm depressed. Forget any ideas of "happiness" I have given up heroin and want OFF methadone as quick as humanly possible. I'm fed up of being a drug addict. Sick to death of it. I wanna be CLEAN!!!

Attack of the Furry Entertainers!

Attack of the Furry Entertainers!

Monday, April 26, 2010

Dogs that do tricks...

I'M CURRENTLY RESEARCHING so if/when I do get a terrier, I can teach her (I would prefer a she-dog because they're even tinier and don't hump your legs and can have puppies if required)... teach her to do tricks.

Does anyone know much about this? Except that you encourage the tiny trotter to do what you want and reward her with chocolate drops/peanuts/etc...

Talking of tiny terriers, I was reading a dogfood can in the corner shop today and realized the food situation is indeed as suspected ~ that a tiny porkie can go all day on a single standard 65p 400g can ~ whereas an American Akita would require FIVE times as much ~ that's £20 a week on doggiefood as opposed to £4 for a porkshire... know what I mean..??!?

I wasn't joking when I said I wanted to train my Norfolk/Porkie/Cairn terrorizer to bundle into a bag and lie quietly as I quickly rush through Morrisons. No way could I leave the poor swine tied outside ~ I would be far too terrified of dogknapping, which IS rife. E.g. my dealer lost a prize Staff(ordshire bull terrorizer) ... I was once accused of eyeing up a dog with theft in mind. It was a grizzled old West Highland with cloudy eyes so what on earth the crazed black man who did the accusing had in mind I don't know but the owner laughed and laughed when he heard it. "The dog is fifteen years old!!" he hooted.

I have noticed that dogs who do tricks are without exception very well behaved (well it stands to reason that trained=obedient). If I can and I ever do get a doggie I want her to do a selection of tricks, including standing on back legs and hopping, jumping over held-out newspaper (like a steeplechase), staying where told, trotting round in circles until told to stop, playing dead etc... in short the type of tricks the Jack Russel Eddie used to perform from time to time on Frasier... then perhaps my tiny troting mophead terrier might become star of a Talented Pets agency and get a starring role on a longrunning TV show ~ y'know as the family pet porkie on a sitcom or whatever...

ANYWAY, can anybody tell me more about teaching a tiny trotterdonkey terrier to do tricks? What tricks she might be persuaded to do?.. And how? Is it possible to train a tiny terrorizer never to yap? Surely the going-2-bed-in-a-bag trick is easy to train...? Lots of posh ladies take their toy doggies everywhere ... into posh restaurants, bars, shops etc... and only get away with it because the furry mutants (I'm not too keen on pomeranians/chewawas/etc ~ I wouldn't want anything more ridiculous than a porkie)... because these furry swines are well trained and habituated to going in a bag and behaving... know what I mean..??

We did have dogs as I was growing gup, but I've never had a doggie of my "own"... only cats, hamsters, tropical fish (inc. giant snail and dwarf aquatic frog)... freshwater prawns ... and a mouse. Never the canine sort of trotters... so:~ ANSWERS PLEASE!!

ANSWERS PLEASE!!

CAIRN TERRIER TRICKS...
I love doggies with furry "beards" growing out of their "boze" (their snout)... aren't they CUTE!!

These are the kind of tricks I'd want my tiny terrier to do... but they'd have to be more professionally executed for TV...
... but this beautiful ケアーン・テリア is still doing a wonderful job ...
... hey do you really think I could get a baby cairn or porkie caste as the next Eddie on the next Frasier?... wouldn't that be amazing!!



YORKSHIRE TERRIER TRICKS...
THIS is the type of puppy I want ~ a very bright little porkie!



You can see some more tiny terrier's tricks on my Amazing Pets blog...




10 comments:

Jeannie said...

Tricks require a LOT of patience and repetition. Certain tricks require a propensity on the part of the dog to do it.

I haven't done nearly enough obedience training with my dog although he is very bright and learns fairly quickly. He is also quite hyper and not calm enough for me to have the patience to teach more complicated tasks. He will sit, say please (beg), lie down, speak, stay, high five. My son taught his dog to also play dead, search, jump over an extended arm.
Any little tidbit can be used as long as the dog views it as a treat. I will often use bits of leftover meat, chopped up hotdogs, popcorn, cheese - rather than expensive treats that the dog doesn't think are nearly as tasty. I will keep little baggies of meat bits in the freezer ready to use.

There are plenty of training videos and sites online - some use a clicker. Getting a small dog to stay quietly in a bag isn't so hard if you do it right from the start - they like the snug safety of it.

Syd said...

Go to obedience training and teach the dog to focus on you using treats. It's easy enough to teach a dog to sit up, roll over, and play dead with treats. There are some sites on line that discuss teaching tricks. Patience and repetition are necessary. Glad that you will get a dog!

Gledwood said...

Jeannie: I would get the dog to sleep in the bag on the floor and only pick it up for a minute or two at start... then keep it in longer and persuade to hide with the bag zipped up. It would need to be comfortable for 15-20 minutes, which is the longest a supermarket trip should take (bearing in mind I only ever buy 1 or 2 bags of stuff)...

I have seen those clickers on TV, though I don't see how they're better than a fingersnap (you cannot, after all, mislay your fingers and have to buy new ones, like you might (or I might~haha!) with a clicker)...

The tricks you mention are the types I would want to teach, though I would like to get the doggie up to professional standard if possible. It would be really cool if the tiny trotter could go on TV...

Syd: I HOPE I will... it's not a dead cert. If I do get one I want to do it properly and not on a shoestring with everything improvised and not as good as it should be. I want my dog to be the best-kept on the block... even if I am worst-kept human being ~~ hahaarrr!!

Sarcastic Bastard said...

I can't help here, Gledds. My dog, Ginger, is a terribly behaved swine. Laugh.

Love,

SB

molson said...

If you get a doggie, do not use chocolate as a treat. Chocolate is a no no for doggies. Also, bitches can and do hump legs.

Baino said...

http://www.dog-obedience-training-review.com/dog-tricks.html#dog-tricks

Use liver treats, not chocolate or peanuts!

Gledwood said...

Sarcastic Bastard: did you give the tiny tearaway any training beyond "toilet"..? Y'know, btw I think most toilet training must surely come naturally... we've all seen the terrible shame on a poor doggie's face e.g. if you stay out too long and the poor swine can hold its toilet in no longer and has an accident... cats are like that too... also have you EVER seen a dog tied up that has done a pooze right next to itself?... never happens, right... so hopefully my baby porkie never will poo in that bag!! That's what I'm hoping... anyhow!!

Molson: is chocolate really that bad? Even if I clean my doggie's teeth morning and evening as I was planning to do?... I was going to use human toothpaste ~ surely that's OK?

I have seen one bitch doing leghumping, but got the distinct impression a perverted human had taught her to do that... SURELY though it's less common?

I wanted a female dog because 1. I've heard with a lot of pets the bond is stronger with the opposite sex (not entirely sure why. I spose it's like with people when you go into a shop generally you're likely to get better service from someone of the opposite sex, people are more likely to give benefit of the doubt if they're the opposite sex... actually is this true at all? I don't know oh well. Basically female dogs are 20% tinier so a 6kg cairn terrier would weigh 5kg, a 4kg porkie 3.5kg... and so on and I want the tiniest little trotter I can get, just like my hamsters ~ easier to hide, cheaper to feed, haha!!

Baino: many thanks for that doggietrickstering link... well I spose at least I can guarantee I won't be at the LIVER enough to run out... like I almost certainly will do enough to have to stock up daily as I would on the chocolate peanuts and raisins... haha!

molson said...

Chocolate will make your doggie sick. No people toothpaste either. There is special toothpaste for doggies.

Gledwood said...

What's the difference between people and doggie toothpaste? I was going to say "except for doggie being more expensive"... but I can't think it would be that much more expensive... is it nonfluoridated... or something??

molson said...

People toothpaste is toxic. Your doggie would end up eating it and well that would be bad. Doggie toothpaste is edible and is not minty. Also, grapes and raisins are toxic to dogs as well. Add onions to the list as well. You taking notes here?

I WANT OFF METHADONE AS QUICK AS HUMANLY POSSIBLE!

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Heroin Shortage: News

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Christiane F

"Wir, Kinder vom Bahnhoff Zoo" by "Christiane F", memoir of a teenage heroin addict and prostitute, was a massive bestseller in Europe and is now a set text in German schools. Bahnhoff Zoo was, until recently, Berlin's central railway station. A kind of equivalent (in more ways than one) to London's King's Cross... Of course my local library doesn't have it. So I'm going to have to order it through a bookshop and plough through the text in German. I asked my druggieworker Maple Syrup, who is Italiana how she learned English and she said reading books is the best way. CHRISTIANE F: TRAILER You can watch the entire 120-min movie in 12 parts at my Random blog. Every section EXCEPT part one is subtitled in English (sorry: but if you skip past you still get the gist) ~ to watch it all click HERE.

To See Gledwood's Entire Blog...

DID you find my blog via a Google or other search? Are you stuck on a post dated some time ago? Do you want to read Gledwood Volume 2 right from "the top" ~ ie from today?
If so click here and you'll get to the most recent post immediately!

Drugs Videos

Most of these come from my Random blog, which is an electronic scrapbook of stuff I thought I might like to view at some time or other. For those who want to view stuff on drugs I've collected the very best links here. Unless otherwise stated these are full-length features, usually an hour or more.

If you have a slow connexion and are unused to viewing multiscreen films on Youtube here's what to do: click the first one and play on mute, stopping and starting as it does. Then, when it's done, click on Repeat Play and you get the full entertainment without interruption. While you watch screen one, do the same to screens 2, 3 and so on. So as each bit finishes, the next part's ready and waiting.

Mexican Black Tar Heroin: "Dark End"

Khun Sa, whose name meant Prince Prosperous, had been, before his death in the mid 2000s, the world's biggest dealer in China White Heroin: "Lord of the Golden Triangle"

In-depth portrait of the Afghan heroin trade at its very height. Includes heroin-lab bust. "Afghanistan's Fateful Harvest"

Classic miniseries whose title became a catchphrase for the misery of life in East Asian prison. Nicole Kidman plays a privileged middle-class girl set up to mule heroin through Thai customs with the inevitable consequences. This is so long it had to be posted in two parts. "Bangkok Hilton 1" (first 2 hours or so); "Bangkok Hilton 2" (last couple of hours).

Short film: from tapwater-clear H4 in the USA to murky black Afghan brown in Norway: "Heroin Addicts Speak"

Before his untimely death this guy kept a video diary. Here's the hour-long highlights as broadcast on BBC TV: "Ben: Diary of a Heroin Addict". Thanks to Noah for the original link.

Some of the most entertaining scenes from Britain's top soap (as much for the poor research as anything else). Not even Phil Mitchell would go from nought to multi-hundred pound binges this fast: "Phil Mitchell on Crack" (just over 5 minutes).

Scientist lady shows us how to cook up gear: "How Much Citric?" Lucky cow: her brown is 70% purity! Oddly we never see her actually do her hit... maybe she got camera shy...

And lastly:

German documentary following a life from teenage addiction to untimely death before the age of 30. The decline in this girl's appearance is truly shocking. "Süchtig: Protokoll einer Hilflosigkeit". Sorry no subtitles; this is here for anyone learning German who's after practice material a little more gripping than Lindenstraße!































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