HAMSTERS & HEROIN: Not all junkies are purse-snatching grandmother-killing psychos. I'm keeping this blog to bear witness to that fact.


Gledwoods deutscher Blog

Bitte hier klicken ...


I used to take heroin at every opportunity, for over 10 years, now I just take methadone which supposedly "stabilizes" me though I feel more destabilized than ever before despite having been relatively well behaved since late November/early December 2010... and VERY ANGRY about this when I let it get to me so I try not to.

I was told by a mental health nurse that my heroin addiction was "self medication" for a mood disorder that has recently become severe enough to cause psychotic episodes. As well as methadone I take antipsychotics daily. Despite my problems I consider myself a very sane person. My priority is to attain stability. I go to Narcotics Anonymous because I "want what they have" ~ Serenity.

My old blog used to say "candid confessions of a heroin and crack cocaine addict" how come that one comes up when I google "heroin blog" and not this one. THIS IS MY BLOG. I don't flatter myself that every reader knows everything about me and follows closely every single word every day which is why I repeat myself. Most of that is for your benefit not mine.

This is my own private diary, my journal. It is aimed at impressing no-one. It is kept for my own benefit to show where I have been and hopefully to put off somebody somewhere from ever getting into the awful mess I did and still cannot crawl out of. Despite no drugs. I still drink, I'm currently working on reducing my alcohol intake to zero.

If you have something to say you are welcome to comment. Frankness I can handle. Timewasters should try their own suggestions on themselves before wasting time thinking of ME.

PS After years of waxing and waning "mental" symptoms that made me think I had depression and possibly mild bipolar I now have found out I'm schizoaffective. My mood has been constantly "cycling" since December 2010. Mostly towards mania (an excited non-druggy "high"). For me, schizoaffective means bipolar with (sometimes severe)
mania and flashes of depression (occasionally severe) with bits of schizophrenia chucked on top. You could see it as bipolar manic-depression with sparkly knobs on ... I'm on antipsychotic pills but currently no mood stabilizer. I quite enjoy being a bit manic it gives the feelings of confidence and excitement people say they use cocaine for. But this is natural and it's free, so I don't see my "illness" as a downer. It does, however, make life exceedingly hard to engage with...

PPS The "elevated mood" is long gone. Now I'm depressed. Forget any ideas of "happiness" I have given up heroin and want OFF methadone as quick as humanly possible. I'm fed up of being a drug addict. Sick to death of it. I wanna be CLEAN!!!

Attack of the Furry Entertainers!

Attack of the Furry Entertainers!

Wednesday, January 09, 2008

Chinese Curry Sauce Recipe: the net closes in! + Hillary for President!!

FOR ONCE IN MY LIFE MY HUNCH SEEMED TO BE RIGHT! Hillary is pulling through... I know lots of people see Hillary as rather strident, and Obama has the "likeable" vote, but Obama seems to have said little more than that he's going to "change things" ... Hillary already HAS changed things (as she keeps hammering on) ... I must admit she does have the air of a stateswoman - whether you like her or not. Sorry Hillary fans for those photos: when they came up on the image search I just couldn't resist!

NOW ON TO MORE IMPORTANT MATTERS: CURRY SAUCE. Chinese curry sauce, I might add. NOWHERE on the internet have I found even a vaguely satisfactory recipe for this. They all say basically "take garam masala or Madras curry powder and make a sauce out of it" - duh! If I wanted to make Indian curry I wouldn't specify Chinese would I? Now this Chinese curry has a secret ingredient and I'm pretty sure I'm zeroing in on it. This morning I chucked five-spice (which contains cinnamon, ginger, star anise, fenugreek (STOP PRESS: NO! fennel not fenugreek) and cloves) on to fried noodles - tried it and instantly the inimitable flavour of Chinese curry came up. So either it is just fivespice sauce, or it's a curry heavy on ginger and Star Anise (the only top tip I DID get from my Chinese curry secrets searching). I'm due to trot out the first experimental batch this afternoon so I'll let you know how I get on.

Am I right that this is a basic curry sauce recipe: stirfry onions and garlic in a little too much oil. Add spices to the oil. Fry for as long as possible (ie 15 minutes if you can) add water to this. Allow to simmer another 10 or 20 mins... and that's basically it? I also bought cornflour this morning but have no idea how to use it. (Maybe if I do I'll end up pulling faces like Hillary's.)

Wish me luck!


Here are two specially good photoblogs:

1. Greek person's magickal Czech photos

2. Dutch person's mysterious morning photo/etc...


Today's (campaign) video:
Hillary vs Obama


jim dandy said...

I've searched my cook books but none seem to specify Chinese. Only Thai and Indian.
Must be some Ancient Chinese Secret.
You go China Town. Ask sum yung gai!

Good Luck!

DirkStar said...

Hey, you run a pretty cheeky blog.

I like it!

Gledwood said...

JimD: I am sure it is a Chinese state secret... just like silk they kept THAT one secret for about 1000 years!!

Dirk: good :->

jan said...


It's going to take a long time to get those images of Hillary out of my mind.

Anonymous said...

After those two winning images, I can't help wondering what Hillary would look like if she went for the Britney cueball look.

john.g. said...

Yikes Gledwood, Hillary looked awful in that pic!

Gledwood said...

Jan: hey they're classic and all I did was google "hillary clinton" under images (not hillary face pull/etc etc)

Kyknoord: unimaginable

JohnG: the top one SURELY is digi-enhanced. SURELY it must be... no?

Bimbimbie said...

.... I'm just wondering what Oprah might do now stick with Obama or do her "Go Girl" for Hillary. We had a great cartoon in our paper after Obama won the first leg .... Hillary with steam coming out of her head hands on hips and the name OPRAH! in her bubble *!*

.... yeah I listened to the radio 4 story about the NG dogs

Gledwood said...

I tried googling that picture but couldn't find it...

Obama looks far too young to be president, don't you think?

Is there always this much pre-selection election fuss around the world about the American presidential race? Or is it because Bush has done 2 terms and definitely has to leave. Or am I just paying more attention this time round? Or a combination of the above?

Gledwood said...

ps didn't those new guinea dogs HOWL?!?! wow I would love to get one as a pet

if i had a proper house. garden. type things... haha

Bimbimbie said...

.... my excuse for using olde words on my post is the rain that's been falling here.

I'll go back through my newspapers and get the cartoon for you - yeah we usually hear a lot of what is going on in the US elections ... too much, but especially this year first woman or non-white President ha everyone talking ... how did your cooking go?

Bimbimbie said...

.... NG dogs .... I loved the bit about the lady living next door who sang back to the dogs! I think your Gwendolin would sound like these *!*

Bimbimbie said...

I've got the cartoon - will email it to you - let me know if you do not get the image and I'll post it on my mine *!*

63mago said...

What is the flavor for? Do you want to thick it, the sauce? That would be a classical "Mehlschwitze": You put flavor in a cup, ad water and mix - not so easy as it seems, than ad to fond - that needs experience, you end up with a "pap" or with something running away. IF it's what you want to do with flavor.

leslie said...

I just noticed your sidebar where you ask us to vote on a name for the dog - I couldn't vote - is it over? I thought Pansy was perfect as it was so ironic considering your description of the mutt.

raffi said...

gleds, your robos rock. i don't like either barack or hillary... they're just too slimy

molson said...

The current state of American politics is nothing short of appalling these days Gledwood. The two main political parties are corrupt and neither are good for America or the rest of the world for that matter. There is no viable third party at this time and probably never will be as the two main parties are hopelessly entrenched. I for one will be glad when the election crap is over. What the heck do I care anyway. I don't have a job in the crummy state I live in and if I can ever sell my house I'm heading for the mountains. Good luck finding me then because I'm going deep under cover. Political rant over... Speaking of mountains, I posted a photo of a mountain gremlin on my site for your entertainment. It looks like a larger version of your pink nose gremlins. It's a pika.

Puss-in-Boots said...

Hi Gleds

Hey, I'm back. I was going stir crazy with no computer. I love reading and doing cryptics but one can have too much of a good thing.

Your little Robos are rather cute. But I think I'll stick with cats. They're a bit larger and won't get sucked up in the vacuum cleaner.

How's it going with you?

WAT said...

A happy new year to u GLEDDERINI as well!

A fine fine assessment of the Hillary I must say. Yer a sharp one over there in the U.K. my friend.

lettuce said...

is it wise to mention "trotting" in a post about curry?

Liz said...

Oh, Lettuce said what I was going to say!

I've become more interested in American politics since I watched West Wing. Now there was a president worth having.

You are making me hungry.

Emperor Ropi said...

they are funny pictures and most of the people don't defend politicians

Gledwood said...

Bimbimbie: Gwendolina loves "baying"... and (this was my imagination - I suppose prompted by "baying at the moon") must always stand under a light source e.g. the kitchen striplight for her soulful howls...

63mago: it's to make a "genuine" Chinese takeaway curry... NOT Indian flavour but like the curry sauce Chinese takeaways make... and it's proving pretty elusive!

Leslie: No the poll closed about 2 weeks ago now... I understand why you wanted Pansy but my own intuition was borne out by the majority vote and I didn't cheat... Gwendolina has the f- (feminine) factor and a force of personality the other 2 names lack...

Raffi: hey what happened to YOU>.???>>

And who DO you like... if anyone for the 2009 presidential "prize"..??

Gledwood said...

Molson: "pika" - I thought that was a 12-pitch typewriter font?... American politix... currupt? no! with all that lobbying..?!?

PussInBoots: I'm surviving... the robbies survive by my never using a vacuum and always sweeping instead!! (ie vacuum = kaput!)

Wat: I'd secretly quite like Hills to win... she is intriguing (to me)

Gledwood said...

Lettuce: I trotted out curry some more this morning! And sweated out ukkfully quite a lot more this afternoon

Liz: there's another American prog meant to be really good... the name seriously escapes me but they were blithering on and on about it on R4.. it's an hbo production (how come everyone here knows hbo and yet we don't even GET the channel?) set among police and drug dealers and the media and politicians etc in Baltimore USA...

Emperor Ropi: as if politicians ever NEED defending (except from bombs/bullets).. (ooer!)

olaf675 said...

The owner of one local Chinese restaurant uses 'Javin Brand "India Style" Curry Powder'.

It's dark yellow in color.

She says she's tried a variety of curry powders and remembers this as having the familiar taste from her past.

I know fairly little about curries, so take it for what little it is worth.

You can get it online at Asia Market Online Store. Yesterday I cleaned out an Asian market of five 16 oz bottles for myself and friends. Given the amount you get per ounce between 8 oz and 16 oz bottles, it is silly to get the 8 oz bottle, though you better like curry!

I hope to try Rhonda Parkinson's "Cantonese Beef Curry"

or her "Chinese Beef Curry"

What brands and types of curries are a definite 'no'?

I was looking for Cantonese Curry recipes, with little results, but now will look for Chinese Curry Recipes.

Any favorite recipes out there????

Anonymous said...

情色電影, aio交友愛情館, 言情小說, 愛情小說, 色情A片, 情色論壇, 色情影片, 視訊聊天室, 免費視訊聊天, 免費視訊, 視訊美女, 視訊交友, ut聊天室, 視訊聊天, 免費視訊聊天室, a片下載, av片, A漫, av dvd, av成人網, 聊天室, 成人論壇, 本土自拍, 自拍, A片, 愛情公寓, 情色, 舊情人, 情色貼圖, 情色文學, 情色交友, 色情聊天室, 色情小說, 一葉情貼圖片區, 情色小說, 色情, 色情遊戲, 情色視訊, 情色電影, aio交友愛情館, 色情a片, 一夜情, 辣妹視訊, 視訊聊天室, 免費視訊聊天, 免費視訊, 視訊, 視訊美女, 美女視訊, 視訊交友, 視訊聊天, 免費視訊聊天室, 情人視訊網, 影音視訊聊天室, 視訊交友90739, 成人影片, 成人交友,

免費A片, 本土自拍, AV女優, 美女視訊, 情色交友, 免費AV, 色情網站, 辣妹視訊, 美女交友, 色情影片, 成人影片, 成人網站, A片,H漫, 18成人, 成人圖片, 成人漫畫, 情色網, 日本A片, 免費A片下載, 性愛, 成人交友, 嘟嘟成人網, 成人電影, 成人, 成人貼圖, 成人小說, 成人文章, 成人圖片區, 免費成人影片, 成人遊戲, 微風成人, 愛情公寓, 情色, 情色貼圖, 情色文學, 做愛, 色情聊天室, 色情小說, 一葉情貼圖片區, 情色小說, 色情, 寄情築園小遊戲, 色情遊戲, 情色視訊,

Anonymous said...

做愛的漫畫圖片, 情色電影分享區, 做愛ㄉ影片, 丁字褲美女寫真, 色美眉, 自拍俱樂部首頁, 日本偷自拍圖片, 色情做愛影片, 情色貼圖區, 八國聯軍情色網, 免費線上a片, 淫蕩女孩自拍, 美國a片, 都都成人站, 色情自拍, 本土自拍照片, 熊貓貼圖區, 色情影片, 5278影片網, 脫星寫真圖片, 粉喵聊天室, 金瓶梅18, sex888影片分享區, 1007視訊, 雙贏論壇, 爆爆爽a片免費看, 天堂私服論壇, 情色電影下載, 成人短片, 麗的線上情色小遊戲, 情色動畫免費下載, 日本女優, 小說論壇, 777成人區, showlive影音聊天網, 聊天室尋夢園, 義大利女星寫真集, 韓國a片, 熟女人妻援交, 0204成人, 性感內衣模特兒, 影片, 情色卡通, 85cc免費影城85cc, 本土自拍照片, 成人漫畫區, 18禁, 情人節阿性,

aaaa片, 免費聊天, 咆哮小老鼠影片分享區, 金瓶梅影片, av女優王國, 78論壇, 女同聊天室, 熟女貼圖, 1069壞朋友論壇gay, 淫蕩少女總部, 日本情色派, 平水相逢, 黑澀會美眉無名, 網路小說免費看, 999東洋成人, 免費視訊聊天, 情色電影分享區, 9k躺伯虎聊天室, 傑克論壇, 日本女星杉本彩寫真, 自拍電影免費下載, a片論壇, 情色短片試看, 素人自拍寫真, 免費成人影音, 彩虹自拍, 小魔女貼影片, 自拍裸體寫真, 禿頭俱樂部, 環球av影音城, 學生色情聊天室, 視訊美女, 辣妹情色圖, 性感卡通美女圖片, 影音, 情色照片 做愛, hilive tv , 忘年之交聊天室, 制服美女, 性感辣妹, ut 女同聊天室, 淫蕩自拍, 處女貼圖貼片區, 聊天ukiss tw, 亞亞成人館, 777成人, 秋瓷炫裸體寫真, 淫蕩天使貼圖, 十八禁成人影音, 禁地論壇, 洪爺淫蕩自拍, 秘書自拍圖片,



Heroin Shortage: News

If you are looking for the British Heroin Drought post, click here; the latest word is in the comments.

Christiane F

"Wir, Kinder vom Bahnhoff Zoo" by "Christiane F", memoir of a teenage heroin addict and prostitute, was a massive bestseller in Europe and is now a set text in German schools. Bahnhoff Zoo was, until recently, Berlin's central railway station. A kind of equivalent (in more ways than one) to London's King's Cross... Of course my local library doesn't have it. So I'm going to have to order it through a bookshop and plough through the text in German. I asked my druggieworker Maple Syrup, who is Italiana how she learned English and she said reading books is the best way. CHRISTIANE F: TRAILER You can watch the entire 120-min movie in 12 parts at my Random blog. Every section EXCEPT part one is subtitled in English (sorry: but if you skip past you still get the gist) ~ to watch it all click HERE.

To See Gledwood's Entire Blog...

DID you find my blog via a Google or other search? Are you stuck on a post dated some time ago? Do you want to read Gledwood Volume 2 right from "the top" ~ ie from today?
If so click here and you'll get to the most recent post immediately!

Drugs Videos

Most of these come from my Random blog, which is an electronic scrapbook of stuff I thought I might like to view at some time or other. For those who want to view stuff on drugs I've collected the very best links here. Unless otherwise stated these are full-length features, usually an hour or more.

If you have a slow connexion and are unused to viewing multiscreen films on Youtube here's what to do: click the first one and play on mute, stopping and starting as it does. Then, when it's done, click on Repeat Play and you get the full entertainment without interruption. While you watch screen one, do the same to screens 2, 3 and so on. So as each bit finishes, the next part's ready and waiting.

Mexican Black Tar Heroin: "Dark End"

Khun Sa, whose name meant Prince Prosperous, had been, before his death in the mid 2000s, the world's biggest dealer in China White Heroin: "Lord of the Golden Triangle"

In-depth portrait of the Afghan heroin trade at its very height. Includes heroin-lab bust. "Afghanistan's Fateful Harvest"

Classic miniseries whose title became a catchphrase for the misery of life in East Asian prison. Nicole Kidman plays a privileged middle-class girl set up to mule heroin through Thai customs with the inevitable consequences. This is so long it had to be posted in two parts. "Bangkok Hilton 1" (first 2 hours or so); "Bangkok Hilton 2" (last couple of hours).

Short film: from tapwater-clear H4 in the USA to murky black Afghan brown in Norway: "Heroin Addicts Speak"

Before his untimely death this guy kept a video diary. Here's the hour-long highlights as broadcast on BBC TV: "Ben: Diary of a Heroin Addict". Thanks to Noah for the original link.

Some of the most entertaining scenes from Britain's top soap (as much for the poor research as anything else). Not even Phil Mitchell would go from nought to multi-hundred pound binges this fast: "Phil Mitchell on Crack" (just over 5 minutes).

Scientist lady shows us how to cook up gear: "How Much Citric?" Lucky cow: her brown is 70% purity! Oddly we never see her actually do her hit... maybe she got camera shy...

And lastly:

German documentary following a life from teenage addiction to untimely death before the age of 30. The decline in this girl's appearance is truly shocking. "Süchtig: Protokoll einer Hilflosigkeit". Sorry no subtitles; this is here for anyone learning German who's after practice material a little more gripping than Lindenstraße!

Nosey Quiz! Have you ever heard voices when you weren't high on drugs?

Manic Magic

Manic Magic

Gledwood Volume 2: A Heroin Addict's Blog

Copyright 2011 by Gledwood