Most of these come from my
Random blog, which is an electronic scrapbook of stuff I thought I might like to view at some time or other. For those who want to view stuff on drugs I've collected the very best links here. Unless otherwise stated these are full-length features, usually an hour or more.
If you have a slow connexion and are unused to viewing multiscreen films on Youtube here's what to do: click the first one and play on mute, stopping and starting as it does. Then, when it's done, click on Repeat Play and you get the full entertainment without interruption. While you watch screen one, do the same to screens 2, 3 and so on. So as each bit finishes, the next part's ready and waiting.
Mexican Black Tar Heroin: "
Dark End"
Khun Sa, whose name meant Prince Prosperous, had been, before his death in the mid 2000s, the world's biggest dealer in China White Heroin: "
Lord of the Golden Triangle"
In-depth portrait of the Afghan heroin trade at its very height. Includes heroin-lab bust. "
Afghanistan's Fateful Harvest"
Classic miniseries whose title became a catchphrase for the misery of life in East Asian prison. Nicole Kidman plays a privileged middle-class girl set up to mule heroin through Thai customs with the inevitable consequences. This is so long it had to be posted in two parts. "
Bangkok Hilton 1" (first 2 hours or so); "
Bangkok Hilton 2" (last couple of hours).
Short film: from tapwater-clear H4 in the USA to murky black Afghan brown in Norway: "
Heroin Addicts Speak"
Before his untimely death this guy kept a video diary. Here's the hour-long highlights as broadcast on BBC TV: "
Ben: Diary of a Heroin Addict". Thanks to
Noah for the original link.
Some of the most entertaining scenes from Britain's top soap (as much for the poor research as anything else). Not even Phil Mitchell would go from nought to multi-hundred pound binges this fast: "
Phil Mitchell on Crack" (just over 5 minutes).
Scientist lady shows us how to cook up gear: "
How Much Citric?" Lucky cow: her brown is 70% purity! Oddly we never see her actually do her hit... maybe she got camera shy...
And lastly:
German documentary following a life from teenage addiction to untimely death before the age of 30. The decline in this girl's appearance is truly shocking. "
Süchtig: Protokoll einer Hilflosigkeit". Sorry no subtitles; this is here for anyone learning German who's after practice material a little more gripping than Lindenstraße!
4 comments:
http://www.lindasdailylivingskills.com/
wondered if you might find this OT's blog useful,knowing you struggle with your daily living skils
didn't really have time to post much earlier but now i'm home watching crap saturday night telly i have the time!
sounds like you are still struggling with your moods, have they reviewed your meds yet if not why not? tell that worker i said.....no not really but you should be able to get to a level you are comfortable with, life does not have to be such a struggle......have they offered you ways to fill your day i know voluntary work is shit but its really important to have meaningful activity what ever that maybe, hope i dont sound like i am preaching cos i am not it just makes me sad that you feel sad....that you talk about death and firing lines......
i do often read your posts just dont always have time to chat....plus my space bar is sort of broken so often words come out all joined up and it really pisses me off. as i have to go back through the text and smack the spacebar with real force to make a space......
love and respect to you
L XX
i stopped taking the risperidone because it does nothing to stop me being depressed at all and i thought it might give me more energy being off it
last time i saw the consultant he was talking about mood stabilizers but i don't want one if i can avoid it. if i do get one i want one like lamictal or whatever it's called, one that blocks depression but not mania. i want another manic episode. when i was manic i was antidrugs. i dont understand why on earth any manic person would feel the need to use drugs particularly uppers but statistically i heard bipolars are more likely to use drugs in an up phase than a down, now that sounds crazy to me
i only use heroin as an antidepressant. if i didn't feel depressed i'd have no need of it at all. it doesn't cure the depression but does make it about 50% better
antidepressants have disagreed with me vehemently in the past. prozac gives euphoria but also that akithisia thing so i'm literally so agitated i can't stay still for even a few seconds
i'm not hearing voices and i only feel slightly paranoid a tiny proportion of the time so i don't see why i need an antipsychotic. also that risperidone really worked strongly against the mania and i want the mania back again, i don't care if i lose it, it's better than being depressed. i do lose my temper when i'm manic (even when i'm on my own) but the mood is usually positive. now i go outside and feel like i'm wading through honey. i hate being wherever i am and just want to be home again.
i don't care about being clean at the moment. i'm more motivated to give up heroin because heroin acts as a mood stabilizer and i need a destabilized mood in order to get it high again
i know i probably sound like a real mess talking like this but i don't see any way out except by getting the mania back, that was the only time i have ever felt my true self and the only time i have ever felt truly positive and antidrugs
big irony was everyone at NA assumed i had to be using to be that hyped up. well i think they're a bunch of naive obsessives. i mean how naive do you have to be to believe that ALL happiness has to be drug-induced. it really begs the question why they bothered giving up in the first place. they're more than willing to believe i'm clean when i'm down, but not when i'm up. and i've noticed before they're crap at addressing mental health problems i'm really surprised not to have heard anyone talk about bipolar in "the rooms" as they say. quite possibly this has to do with every bipolar addict who's come in getting scared off by the utter lack of understanding and acceptance you get for having such a condition
i'm doing an antidrugs course 2 days a week for 2 weeks, it's only 2.5 hours but i'm so exhausted when i get back i just sleep. i'm sleeping hours and hours because i have no energy
my care has got transferred to this other borough where i saw this hostile nurse who had a go at me for using heroin then demanded to know why i was there. i said because i got a letter telling me to come. then he says he will get me a dr's appointment. so a totally wasted appointment, i needed to see a dr from day one, not some half arsed nurse
i don't have much faith in the mental health system all i want is to get my positive mood back, i don't care whether it's called a mental illness i'd rather be psychotic and happy than nonpsychotic and depressed. simple as
thanks for your comment
Really cute little critters.
I like the top photo. I was thinking of changing my Avatar to that :-)
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