I AM SAT HERE IN A BAD MOOD. There's drink in me, so I feel in a good mood. A good bad mood. Or a bad good mood. Whichever. I keep hoping the mood will switch UP. I'm not on a mood stabilizer and don't want one. That will leave me in an eternal twilight state of numbness (won't it?) I went in the library yesterday and read a book called Living Well With Depression and Bipolar by John McManemy he is the guy who does McManWeb, one of the best bipolar sites. He had pretty full-on bipolar by the sound of it. The only thing I wasn't impressed about was his description of schizoaffective, which I supposedly have, as some kind of ultra-florid psychotic mania. I was only like that literally for a few days. Those were the days I was ranting and burbling and I never spoke to my family (thank God). Which is why both sides seem to think I'm OK when I'm not and not OK when I'm fine! They haven't actually seen me in any of these states (bar depression) which might be where the confusion comes in. When I say I don't sleep anything but 2.5 hours a day that's literally what I do. Not exactly house-guest friendly behaviour.
OK I've got to go an annoying person (ie a good friend) is at my house. And I'm not at my house. So I must run.
I hope everyone is all right.
I am clearing my house of ALL junk/rubbish/sundry bluh. It all must go. I probably will not get rehoused as that will be a good thing (ie it won't happen). But I have to pretend I will. To get rid of the rubbish.
OK have a good weekend y'all....
It was Christmas eve in a war zone - I just about managed to rise this morning but shining is still a long way off. I don't know why. Maybe it's because I had my usual stress dream last night....
19 hours ago